Outside every bank in town, there are long, winding queues of people trying to draw their months wages. At one point, I drive through past a fuel queue on one side, and a bank queue on the other. It felt like I was driving through a tunnel. I feel lucky, as I have money in my pocket and petrol in my car.
Last night I went to an MDC rally. Late in the afternoon, I finally managed to persuade my friend to come with me. She had never been to a meeting before, and was scared of being targeted for attending one. At 4pm she was still ‘undecided’ but at 5.45pm, finally gave in. The meeting was due to start at 6pm. As we arrived, I could sense the tension she was feeling, but as the evening progressed she relaxed and it was not long before she was throwing her hands up and cheering along with the rest of us. The atmosphere was electric and the crowd were rearing to go! Nobody was afraid to wear their MDC t-shirts, hats and headbands that are usually not shown in public at all. There is a feeling of complete togetherness.
As we approached the gate to leave, my friend froze! There was a small group of people standing in the exit. She did not know what to do – I realised that she thought there was trouble ahead, and she did not want to go through the gate. I nudged past her and she followed me. There was no trouble. The group that had instantly intimidated her just by their presence, were the young people manning the gate. As we walking back to the car she said to me ‘people are no longer afraid, the MDC will win this time around, because the people are not afraid anymore!’ When I asked her to come with me to the next rally on Saturday she said ‘no way, that’s going to be a big one with Morgan, and there will be trouble’. It is hard to break the cycle of fear that is ingrained after five years of continuous intimidation!
Last night I was at an MDC rally at the amphitheatre in Bulawayo’s Centenary Park, was brought close to tears, goosebumps abounding and the hair standing up on the back of my neck. Seeing the commitment and appreciating the loyalty, the infrastructural organization, the dedication and the outright bravery of those who attended and put the event together was more than inspiring.
At this time of the year people are usually talking about the Easter break and going home to see their families. This year there is no Easter excitement. People do not have money for the transport home. Everybody is instead talking about the elections. Not who will win and who will lose, but how they are going to be rigged. Most of the people I have spoken to, say they are going to vote. They say they ‘have to try’. Not many are optimistic.
My small, half-dozen, circle of (white) friends, is probably more apathetic about this election than the previous two. There is no inclination to get involved or make monetary contributions. They are keeping a very low profile. To a lesser extent this is true of me too. I still strongly question the wisdom of the MDC to have gone back on its intial boycott of the election, with the political playing field so uneven.
The same apathy can be said to prevail with the half-dozen workers I employ. The frank, open exchanges of the last two elections debating policies no longer takes place. We are all too scared lest there should be a Zanu PF sympathiser amongst us. They do however concede that the township violence and harassment of 2000 and 2002 is absent this time round.
I decided to blog under the pseudonym ‘Cold Feet’ because I’m always cold in this part of the world - even in so-called summer, because I feel like a coward for not being in my own country when everyone else is going through such a hard time, and because I’m nervous about even contributing to this blog!
It’s funny: ZANU’s whole campaign seems to be against Tony Blair. Apparently Blair is on a mission to re-colonise Zimbabwe. In the meanwhile, Mugabe’s disastrous policies have made a huge number of us skip the country overseas just so we and our children can survive.
Someone needs to tell our government- it’s one thing to be deliberately colonised by a country, but its completely and totally insane to hand all your skills and assets over to another country on a plate, for nothing!
Maybe if ZANU re-focused on things at home, and stopped making us all so scared for our futures, the millions of us out of the country would come back. And guess what…? We’d be working hard in Zimbabwe, and our taxes would be going to Zimbabwean schools, Zimbabwean children, Zimbabwean health care etc etc etc.
People are so screwed up by life in Zimbabwe in so many ways. I keep thinking of the frog in boiling water story, you know the one; if you put a frog into boiling water, it will try get out, but if you put it in cold water and then heat it slowly it will just get hotter and hotter until it dies. Or so I am told. As if anyone would actually test the hypothesis. But it’s a good metaphor for Zimbabweans. Many of us here at home and not free in the Diaspora just don’t realise what Mugabe’s done to us
and how he has impoverished our lives not only materially but also spiritually. The warmth and compassion we used to have for each other is almost non-existent. Intolerance and disrespect is the norm, irrespective of political orientation.
Yesterday I read an article in the newspaper about a woman who transported her very ill husband to a hospital in a skanya (a small hand pushed cart, usually about 1.5 metres long by 1 metre wide). When she got to the hospital, she was turned away, or as the nurse put it ‘referred to another hospital’. The next hospital was miles away. She had no money for transport. She had no assistance from the hospital because they had no doctor, or medical supplies. Her husband lies bleeding from the nose and mouth beside her.
In a first world country, this would cause an outcry. Here at home, it has become the norm. People don’t bother to complain, because they know nothing will be done. Today I read that one Zimbabwean child dies from AIDS every 15 minutes. I wonder much lower we have to go before the rest of the world takes notice?
There is a mood of optimism sweeping the suburbs. The hugely successful and well attended MDC rallies at Northside Church seem to have infused voters with hope. The apathy that was characteristic of people in this area may well disappear in the next few days. People who only a few weeks ago said they couldn’t be bothered to go and queue to vote are now saying that with so many polling stations, there won’t be long queues and they are prepared to vote on the 31st.
All uncannily quiet and calm here, very unlike the previous election.One disturbing story circulating is that the troops in the DRC “voted” a good 6 weeks ago and the ballot papers were all so pristine that it is doubtful that they ever left this country!
I was sad today. My girlfriend said she will not spend the easter holiday with me. She will be going home to see her parents. Home for her is Masvingo, the centre of Shona custom. Home will have a special meaning this Easter for Ruth*, affectionately called “My Sunshine” by yours truly. She has vowed that she will be voting. “I will cast my vote on the 31st.” She said to me, “There is this lady in our street at home.” She added, “Her campaign to be an elected representative of the people has been phenomenal. She has stood for councillor, she has stood for District Representative for her party, she is now going to stand for MP.” She looks at me with determination in her eyes, ” I am going to vote for that woman this time around, I think she deserves the praise of everyone in the community.”
I swallow down the urge to remind Ruth that ours is a new found love that blossoms with every kiss and hug. I see in her the simple determination and reason that will drive the elections forward. Not many are thinking about the rigging, the violence and the intimidation. Many are looking at the elections with hope for a better future. People talk about the interviews held on TV and radio at workplaces and in commuter omnibuses. People make sacrifices to elected representatives. People wait for the dawn of a new era, today methinks Easter is coming with a difference.
*Name changed by Sokwanele
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